Grown Up?

Today I sat at work trying to figure out what I'm doing this weekend. After about 15 minutes of thinking I realized that things have really changed in the last 4 years. I've lost contact with almost everyone I went out with.

Reflecting over it, I realized that I myself have changed significantly over the years. At one point in my life, going out daily was the normal thing. I was carefree and didn't think about much. Everyday was going out, eating, shooting pool or working on cars. Slowly after high school was over I started drifting from that group. As far as I know they still all socialize together.

I started keeping to myself and slowly lost contact with everyone I once knew. Which results in what I am today. I go to work, come home, sleep. On weekends I pretty much feel lonely. Yes I am in a relationship but she's busy with school so if I were to complain, that would just make me a selfish prick.

I think the conclusion I'm arriving at is that I feel...old. I know I'm only 22 but I feel OLD. I don't really know what the next step in my life is. I have a job that I've been employed at for 2 years, I don't really see myself leaving it nor do I see myself really making any new friends. It's scary to say but I think that the next step I want to take is to start a family. I can't really explain it but just the idea of being married and having family to come home to makes me smile.

The problem with that is I am only 22 and that path will probably not unfold for another 6 years. (stuff happens) According to people, and by people I mean everyone, think that the ideal life is to hump every physically attractive girl possible. Fortunately or not, I do not share that same mindset, I've always been faithful to my partners and hope for the same in return.

I do agree that social gatherings are indeed fun occasionally. The only thing I do not like about them is that every guy there is trying to get some, even if the girl is taken. That's the problem right there, and it's not just an individual's fault. Most of the time I am disgusted by both people if cheating occurs. Most people just blame the girl for cheating and call her a slut, which in turn I do agree with. The other part though, I think is always over-looked. If a guy knows she's in a relationship he needs to back off. How would you like it if some random guy was doing your partner? Because of just that, I find myself avoiding the parties I once use to attend.

I do hope that my life pans out the way I want it to, but sometimes I find myself wishing i was 16 again. For all those that watch or have seen the show house. I'd probably say I am like Wilson.

(Also decided to start posting sotd with youtube link if availible)
SOTD: "Passing Afternoon"~Iron and Wine